Yearly Chaos Incursion! Be wary!

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Repetition of General Directive 264-A-XCIV

To: Distribution, Sectorium Primus
From: Office of The Grand Inquisitor, Ebineezar Grinchanius
Re: Yearly Chaos Incursion

This purpose of this notice is to remind the forgetful of the annual visitation by the minion of Chaos known to the unworthy as Santa Claus.

+++ The Emperor's Light Banishes the Shadows of Heresy +++

As the diligent will recall, the incursion occurs regularly every 8742 to
8766 Terran hours, roughly corresponding to a Terran year. This trespass has
occurred with disturbing regularity since at least the Horus Heresy, and
perhaps longer, as many records were misplaced.

+++ Love and Obey the Emperor +++

The faithful will recognize the target on sight, as his garb and gear mark
him immediately as an agent of the abominations.

Santa Claus is a corpulent, bloated creature approximating the human form.
It wears a crimson tunic the color of fresh blood, marking him as a possible
follower of Khorne. It is bearded, mocking the honorable Squats, and its
hair is a sallow shade of gray, betraying its unnatural age. Be advised that
despite the creatures fearsome name, no claws have been observed, and the
former is likely a ruse.

The target has been observed in the company of smaller creatures having the
appearance of thin (less than 30 kg, approx.), stunted (1.5 meters)
humanoids with pointed ears. Their appearance suggests the involvement of
the decadent panzee, and although that race denies involvement (*reference
the Rudolphian Campaign [index 4111-BGE-MMXCII-Primus], specifically the
Battle of Yukon Coneliaus IV [ibid., index 6]*), agents are advised to be
prepared for their involvement, as the panzee are known for their deceitful
ways.

Santa Claus is conveyed by means of a grav-sled powered by unnatural
livestock as detailed below.

The target's vehicle is a grav-sled. It has superfluous runners which are
used only on landing and take-off. Despite the appearance, no frozen water
is necessary for its operation (another ruse). The vehicle's resemblance to
the foul Palanquin of Nurgle should not be discounted, even though the
colors continue to be reminiscent of Khorne.

The device is powered by the unholy ministrations of eight or nine
quadrupeds. Ordo Malleus scholars have identified these creatures as warped
versions of an extinct species of Terran mammal known as a Moose (reference
900002-ER-CIV). These beings single-mindedly pull the target's vehicle
during its yearly invasion. They are outfitted with belled harnesses which
are apparently imbued with the ability of flight. These beasts have been
likened to the Fiends of Slaanesh, and such a comparison should not be
dismissed too lightly, as the creatures shed a luminous substance as
effluent as they move. Inquisitors should take care to avoid exposure.

Perhaps more disturbing is the variable number of the minion-creatures. On
occasion, a ninth Moose has been observed, placed before the other Mooses.
This creature radiates a sickly reddish glow from its snout, as a psychic
beacon to other followers of the Vile Ones. This Chaotic device has allowed
the target to navigate despite our best efforts to jam its navigation
systems.

+++ Blessed is the Virtue of Blind Faith +++

Santa Claus gains entry to the domiciles of loyal Imperial Citizens (see
below) and leaves small Chaos Rewards to tempt the faithful.

Inquisitors are reminded to confiscate and incinerate these items before any
lasting damage is done. As a localized temporal distortion field is in
effect around the target, these items are secreted in the habitations of the
Imperium at exactly 2400 hours in every location defiled by the creature. It
is therefore possible to gain entry to the citizens' quarters and remove the
items (often cunningly hidden in footwear) before the citizens are aware of
the heresy that has been committed upon them.

In other cases, removal of the items after the citizens have discovered them
is possible. In such situations, small children are occasionally loath to
surrender the items, as the tainting of the juveniles has already begun.
Executions of the above are to be handled in the most expedient manner
possible.

Often, juveniles that are well within the Emperor's Grace are given small
blocks of graphite ore rather than the more tempting gifts visited upon the
less faithful. The identity of these individuals are to be recorded, as
future recruitment into the Inquisition or Adeptus Terra is possible [Note:
Inquisitors or other agents who do *not* receive the graphite stones should
be watched carefully].

Santa Claus enters the domiciles be way of heating ducts and waste vents.
The size of the opening is not a factor, as the creature can adjust its mass
and displacement by means of psychic manipulation. Mining these openings
with frag, krak and other demolitions has proven unsuccessful.

The creature egresses by the same means, after ritually caressing his
nostrils. No mucus has ever been recovered.

+++ The Death of Emperor's Enemies is the Only Gift We Can Give +++

Although all previous attempts at the destruction of Santa Claus have
failed, Inquisitors are urged to make such an attempt whenever possible.

However, of more importance is the suppression of cultist activity
associated with the yearly incursion. The Tainted have been known to erect
shrines in their homes in the form of shrubbery adorned with baubles and
lights [Note: the shrubbery is often highly inflammable, and offers a
discrete method of executing the offending heretics without calling undue
attention to the operation].

Other warning signs include:

- Hallucinations involving sugared candies during slumber;
- Excessive singing;
- References to "a magical time of year" (note the influence of Tzeentch);
- The construction of effigies made of snow; and
- The performance of Slaanishi rituals while underneath plant clippings of the
genus Phoradendron flavescens.

Once again, executions should be handled in an expedient manner.

+++The Emperor Protects+++

End Transmission

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Cmparing the GW City Mat to the FAT mat

Hey guys,

  Did a video comparison of the new games workshop Battle Mat: City Ruin vs the FAT mat.  All in all, I am quite surprised that they are so comparable.  Same density, thickness, print quality etc.  If anything, the GW mat may have the edge (literally) because the  edges are reinforced.

  Still, they come in a box... <sigh>.  I'll roll mine, thank you.

Enjoy!  Thanks to all of you fine readers!

Angel's Blade Special Edition Unboxing

You guessed it, Angels Blade, in all its glory!!

Unboxing Gorechosen video

Video unboxing of the Gorechosen game!

Enjoy!

Video review of the Shattered Dominion Realm of Battle Boards

Hey guys, posted a video review of the Shattered Dominion Realm of Battle Boards...

Enjoy!!

Codex: Deathwatch, Watch Fortress Edition - video

Hey guys, just released a YouTube unboxing of the Watch Fortress Collector's Edition...Enjoy!!

Shattered Dominion Base sets video

Hey all...  New video posted, unboxing/reviewing the Shattered Dominion base sets for AoS

Enjoy!

Baleful realmgate #1 - done

Hey guys,
  Finished up a realm gate last night, thought I might share.  I like the way it came out, but I am kind of biased...

  Went with a bleached  stone effect, but used the Duncan Rhodes video as my guide (my date with Duncan, heh).  First time trying the glowing effect, I think it came out ok.

  

Let me know what you think!

The Season of War begins...

  The Season of War has begun in earnest.  Got out first games in tonight, and for my part, I did not hold true to Sigmar's faith in me.  I failed, and hopefully I will be reforged with better results!  Heh!

  Played a really great game against a member of the Rolling Bad community (Youngblood) and his Grot/Spider army. (Arachnarok w/flinger, 2x10 Grot spider riders, Grot boss on Gigantic Spider).

  My Army was a Lord Celestant on Dracoth (lamer), 5 Protectors, 10 Liberators (hammer/shield), 5 Liberators (2 blade) and 5 Judicators (xbow).

  The rules for the scenario of Season of war were interesting, and we set an 850pt limit for our game (which we both exceeded by a few :).  We played on a 4x4 because of the size and it was great.  In the end, the warriors of Sigmar could not hold back the tide of spidery destruction and we succumbed.  The problem was the general, not the army :) 

  So, get out there and enjoy the Season of War, this is gonna be a hoot!


  Here are a couple of shots of the swag that comes with the season of war and a choice photo of the game or two.   

   Player card and wrist band...  on the back of the card you can track your painting progress, which as you will see, I have much opportunity!

   Faction pins.  Kinda nice actually

  A set of tokens to use in game.  I think they took my idea!!! :)

 10 Liberators against 10 Spiders, it was a pretty fair fight!  I ended up winning this one with 2-3 Libs left.  Of course, they re-spawned and ruined my day elsewhere :0

 10 Liberators against ... oh dear god-king, that's an... ahhhhhhhh.  Yeah, 10 Libs did not slow the Arachnarok much... Even when I rolled all hits...

He laughed and saved them all...

Still, cracking good fun!

See you in the Realms!

The Rolling Bad Podcast...

  Been a while, and for that I apologize.  I have been traveling for a work a lot and rather busy around the house too, remodeling a bathroom and such.

Another little thing popped up as well, 

I became 1/3 of an Age of Sigmar podcast.

Yeah, took the plunge and started up a second podcast with James Tapia and Elric Edge.  We're focused on Age of Sigmar, but we'll cover the hobby as a whole and have a some fun on the way.

  Our new baby is coming out every two weeks (ish) and is located at http://apple.co/28N9BUY

Hope you enjoy!!!

Improving your wet Palette

  Hey guys,  just a quick video on improving your wet palette.  Using some real artist tools makes a big difference.

Molding an airbrush custom handle with Sugru

  Hey guys,

  Just wanted to share a quick post/tip.  I have a Sotar 20/20 airbrush and I love the comfort handle it has.  Unfortunately, neither my Iwata Eclipse or H&S Infinity have the same thing.  Then I thought about the packets of Sugru I have sitting around.  5 minutes later, I have a nice comfort grip on the brush.  It's actually better than the Sotar, because it is much softer.

  If you don't know, Sugru is a moldable rubber product that you use to do lots of things with.  It dires in about 24 hours and becomes very rubbery, not solid and hard.  It's great for molding handles onto things, I've also used it to make x-acto blade handles more comfortable and less "rolly".  Here is a link to the product on Amazon.

  Anyhow, you just knead it a while, shape it to what you want then apply it.  It sticks to jut about anything (but it can be removed if you hate what you did...).   So I shaped it, put it on the airbrush then went through the motions of using it to get the fit right.  Then I just let it cure overnight and presto, instant comfortable airbrush handle. 

  So, that's it.  Hope it helps somebody!

Imperial Knights Renegade Video unboxing and thoughts

Wow, this is a cracking good value guys.  2 Knights and a Sanctum Imperialis for $195 (US).  That's a savings of $152 from separate purchases.

Take a look;




Enjoy, and thanks!

Preliminary FAQs for AoS (from GW FB Page)

  Hey folks, the first draft of a FAQ from GW are out on the AoS FB page.  I took the liberty of cutting and pasting the info and putting it into a MS Word doc, for easier reading.


Copy of Preliminary Age of Sigmar FAQ from GW

  Enjoy.

A video respose to question - Why play AoS?

Hey guys,

  I did a video response to Vince Venturella and Ant's videos on why to play Age of Sigmar.  These are my thoughts, as someone who does not have a background in WHFB. 

  Vince did a great reply, but I thought I might add to it from a different angle - a newbie.
Links to the original videos;

Ant's original video question - https://youtu.be/rlsQRKiACL0

Vince Venturella's Reply video - https://youtu.be/TWyudFgiGmw

  It's rather long, but there it is...

Modcubes reviewed (video)

Hey guys, just got my set of Modcubes today, boy are they very nice!  I did a video review, here for your pleasure!




You can get your set at: https://modcube.myshopify.com/

Have a great weekend!

More Age of Sigmar Markers (free!)

 Hello folks!

  I made up some new markers for Age of Sigmar after playing a few more games.  These are the same 1 inch rounds from the last time.  I will link to the round hole cutter and the nice plastic caps as well.  Without further ado, here they are;

Set #2

Set #3

As you can see, they are more focused on rerolls and effects that add and subtract from things.  There are also some General markers to make sure everyone knows where your leader is.

Here are some links for you to download them;


Zip file with everything - includes the PDF, PNG, JPG and Autodesk Graphic files.

A link to the post on how to assemble them and get the toys you need is here.

  So, there you go.  I hope someone finds them a little useful!  I know I sure do!

Video Review of Forge World's Modeling Masterclass Horus Heresy Book.

  Did a short video review of the latest forge world masterclass book.  Not as good as the past ones, but still pretty decent...

Enjoy!

WHFB Players killed their game, don’t let them kill AoS too

 
  Hopefully the hate has died down and I can write this without getting lynched.  When GW announced that they were killing WHFB, I was not too surprised.  Everyone knew the game was dead (from a sales perspective) and it showed.  I won’t list the litany of problems with the game, from convoluted rules, to an entry price that was too high even for well heeled folks.  Not to mention the drudgery of painting 62 skeletons/skaven/troopers/etc. only to have them destroyed before turn one.

  Now, I know I am not breaking new ground here, but it really was the existing fan base that killed the game.  I know none of them ever intended it, or even meant for it to happen, it was a by product of the system and the evolution of the game.  All the players I know of had their armies, and they were not adding to them.  They were not buying new stuff.  Add to that the fact the GW hadn’t really put out anything new of fresh in a while and stagnation is the only possible end result.

  One thing that really surprised me though was the pure vitriol that spewed forth over AoS.  I know EXACTLY how I would feel if WH40K got the same treatment, so I am not saying anyone was wrong for it.  I’m just kind of shocked at the energy that was put into hating on AoS and GW.  If half of that energy had been put into creating a vibrant, demanding WHFB community, who knows where we would be by now?  But for the community to so soundly crush AoS before ever even seeing it or playing is pretty astounding to me.  I know when rage overcomes reason that things tend to get ugly, but seriously, come on. 

  I have played some AoS (and I never would have played WHFB) and I have enjoyed it.  I have been reasonably amused at the folks that have put up video batreps and other such items without understanding the idea of the game.  I played through a few scenarios and found that there are some VERY important differences with this game and other GW type games.

1 - Scenarios are critical.  If you play a “kill the warlord” game, it is going to suck.  Flat out, suck.  It is a system designed for the warscroll/battleplan paradigm that they have introduced with the game.  Scenarios are often designed with some strange rules that make sense only when you see them in action.  Also pay attention to the Time of War entries as well.  Some of these rules are critical to recreating the scenarios.

2 - Terrain is required and critical as well.  Playing on a wide open board is lame as hell and ruins the effect as well as the game play. 

3 - You can buy into this game VERY inexpensively - Hell all the rules are free.  This really is a gateway drug, and there aren’t many of those games left.  New folks to the hobby can get into this game with just a starter set and have some reasonably good fun for a while.  Then they can branch out more and more until they scratch that itch or chuck it all.  Along the way they will find other races, new models and who knows, we may have a new 40k gamer out there, or a Warmachine player…  who cares, as long as the hobby grows.

4 - The game is fun.  That’s right, it is anathema to tournament players.  It is the anti-christ for all hard-core gamers.  It is designed for fun, meant to be fun and is fun.  It is not for the beat-face, net-listing, IN YOUR FACE gamer.  So if you are that guy, please don’t run it down  just to make yourself feel superior.  All your doing is killing the hobby and ruining it for everyone.
 
  I have never understood why someone who does not like a particular game/system/faction has to run it down, loudly for everyone to hear, just to make them fell better about themselves??  You do not need to explain to me how much AoS sucks in the face of the death of WHFB.  All your blustering will not bring WHFB back.  It’s dead, turn the page.  If you cannot get over it, move on to other systems and stfu.  (I hear wrath of kings is a good replacement and they are trying to get rules out to cover every WHFB model ever made.  Very good idea, I must say.)  Just don’t try to ruin my fun, and anyone else’s who wants to give AoS a legitimate chance.  If it’s not your thing, fine.  Move along.  You ruined your game, don’t ruin mine.
     

Harder & Steenbeck Infinity CR Plus 2 in 1 airbrush review (vid)

  Yes, a wish list item arrived today, and even though I'm a bit under the weather, I had to unbox and review it.  And this time, no compressor noise.  I'm getting better at this.  lol.  Hope you enjoy!

Horus Heresy Book 6 reviewed! (Video)

Here is my review of the Forgeworld Horus Heresy Book 6.  Another in a line of stellar offerings from the boys in the forge...

Enjoy!

Iwata HP-CS Airbrush, unbox and review

  New video up on youtube.  Had to get a replacement for my renegade Krome, something went wrong with it and it just bubbles now.  I went to Hobby Lobby and got an Iwata Eclipse HP-CS, and I unbox and demo it...  Enjoy!

Assault Dice - Software Review

  I have had this software on my iPad and iPhone for some time now, and realized I had never talked about it.

  Assault dice is available from the App Store for the iPhone and the iPad and it is actually quite a good program.   What is it?  It's a die roller.  It's a monster number of dice roller too.  It lets you save multiple layouts and dice setups so it is very flexible as well.  On my iPad I can roll up to 120 dice at once, so look out Astra Militarum!

  The way it works is relatively simple.  It has a built in tutorial that gets you familiar with the layouts and how to manipulate them. 

  You go to the main menu and open a new layout, then you add dice of the appropriate colors.  After that, it's a simple tap to roll the dice.  The program handles re-rolls easily, if a bit wonkily.  Once you have your dice rolled, you press and hold on a die to highlight all the dice, then you un-hilight the ones you want to keep.  The dice that stay highlighted are re-rolled when you hit the roll button.  At the top of the rolling screen you get a summary of the results making it very handy to count hits.

  Since you can have multiple layouts, you can have particular layouts for specific units.  Since you can add multiple color dice to each layout, you can have them separated by weapon type or whatever you need. You can also add new dice as you go in each layout, so it is very flexible and easy to use in a game situation.  You can also 'trash' dice easily if you go down a few hits due to casualties...

  There is also a scatter die screen with a pretty nice visual reference of the direction.  Kinda cool!

  When all is said and done, it is very handy, well programmed, even if the interface is a little wonky in certain places.

  As a side note, the first version of the program did have a problem on re-rolls, where the dice would hit other dice and change their faces, this has been fixed and it no longer does that, so have no fear.

  The roller is set up for 40k, but it is quite simple to use for other games with D6s as well. 

  Overalll, this one gets an A- from me.  Only because the interface is slightly odd in spots.  But it is very good in all other ways.  I only wish they had a D10 option.

Cryx Kraken Unboxing

More Warmachine stuff...  A video unboxing of rthe Cryx Kraken...

Enjoy...

How to save your paints from drying in the pot

Hey guys,

  A quick video with a tip to help save your paints...

Or view straight from youtube at https://youtu.be/4EJrzka_BG4

Take care!

Citadel Rangefinder - A review of perfection...

  Guys, it isn't often that a product jumps off a store shelf and grabs you by the collar, screaming "BUY ME NOW".  So, when a product does something like that, you pay attention, follow your gut and do what it says.

  Now, to be fair, I have told you guys many times that I am a far better collector than player.  I'm more at home crafting things up, building and painting than leaning across a table staring down an opponent.  That will all change. NOW.

  No more will I ever have to look at a game table and wonder, "will my Stormcast Judicator be able to shoot, should I move, should I stay, I just DON'T KNOW!"  That's usually when I have my breakdown and quit the game, flipping the table in a fit of rage and confusion.  (Lucky for me I solo a lot, so nobody has beaten the shit out of me yet.)

  Well, never again guys.  You tournament players will start to KNOW MY FACE as I start owning your pansy asses.  I have a CITADEL RANGEFINDER.  I know how far things are now.  I know where that Land Raider goes.  I know how to deep strike.  I know when you're in range of my Whirlwind!  I own the landscape, BABY!

  I cannot begin to tell you how cool this thing is.  It is just a tape measure, sure.  But it's a $33(US) tape measure.  You know the minute you pick it up, it's made of pure sigmarite (might be pot metal, not sure...).  It's heavy and it's big.  Too big to game with, that's it's major secret.  It's really heavy, did I mention that?  and Round... yes, round, so if you drop it, it kind of rolls...  Brilliance.  Did I mention it was too big?  The thing is like a hunk of sigmarite-sausage and it weighs 10 freaking pounds.  I think half my opponents fear the idea of me throwing it more than simply losing to me.

  When someone see's you come to the table with your Citadel Rangefinder, they will RUN.  (Someone said they were laughing at me, not running, but I thought I smelled fear).

  And get this...

" the diecast case holds a metal tape measure with markings at the half-inch, three-inch, 12-inch and eighteen-inch points – all the important measurements for combat in games of Warhammer Age of Sigmar! "

  What other tape measure has markings so carefully placed there?   I mean who knew?  Marking a tape measure with... ummm... measurements.  It's a fucking brain exploding idea there.  You're not going to find a tape measure with markings like that at any local freaking hardware store for $2, I'll tell you that right now!   Oh sure, they may have one with inches, and one with CM, maybe even one with both.  But who in hell ever thought of this?  CITADEL DID!  (All you GW haters are pretty envious right now, I bet, cuz you can't buy one.)

  This tape measure has changed my gaming life, I am here to tell you.  Where before I wavered at the sight of opponents, now I stride confidently into the gaming room.  With my Citadel Combat Gauge around my neck and my Rangefinder in hand, I have my opponents quaking in fear.  Most of them cannot bear to look me in the eyes.  (I thought I heard snickering once, but I turned quickly and saw them still shaking...)

Yep, I own the Meta now...

  All these years I have told my wife what 8 inches is like...  Now I can prove it. (Note... I think my own Rangefinder may be a little undercalibrated...)

To anyone who thinks I am even a little serious... Please.  This is a $33 piece of crap tape measure.  Go to a store, spend $2 on a cheap one and the rest on beer.  This thing is a fucking joke.  The worst part?  I actually did buy one to look at and do this review, so who is laughing now?  You guys and GW :)

Garro - Knight Errant - An Audiobook Review

  This is a bit of a departure for me, I don't normally review non-gamey things, but this was something I really enjoy(ed).

  If you're not familiar with the black library audio line, let me describe.  They have audiobooks, which are narrations of the different print books in their line.  A very handy way to 'read' a book if you have a long commute or other times that you have to devote to listening while you do other things.  The audio dramas, on the other hand, are small (1 hour-ish) plays like old time radio shows.  I find most of the audio dramas to be cracking good and I have my fair share of them.

  I'm also a big fan of Nathaniel Garro (a former captain of the Death Guard Legion, survivor of Isstvan III, hero of the Eisenstein and all around good guy.)  This boxed set is all 6 of the currently released Garro audio dramas, and I really enjoy each of them.  At $80 (US) it's a bit pricey, but the single dramas in the series range in price from $4 to $30, so you do a get a decent enough break on the 6-pack.  You also get the script of each drama and some bonus wallpapers.  All of the dramas are written by James Swallow, and he is a damned fine author, IMHO.

  The dramas take you along the path he treads after the events of the Eisenstein all the way up to him involved with the founding of the "secretive order dedicated to the eradication of chaos" *cough*Grey Knights*cough*...

  As much as I would love to tell the story of the Knight Errant, it would spoil it for those how have not heard it, let me just say that the story arc across the 6 books is at once exciting, uplifting and sort of gut wrenching too.  Garro has to make some weighty decisions along the way and some are pretty tough.

  Technically, these audio dramas show marked improvement along the arc.  They mirror the production value of all the black library dramas.  In the beginning ones, the sound effects are a little cheesey and the editing is a bit wonky here and there.  As they go on, they get better and better until in the final story, they are really very professional and well done.

  The stories pull you in and really make you root for the 'good guys'.  I have to say, my personal favorite is "Legion of One", mostly because of the really cool character who makes a come-back.  The stories are all set in the Horus Heresy era, so they fit in with the times nowadays.

  So, if you have put off these audio dramas, I would urge you to take a listen to one that covers something you like.  They are a bit pricey, but they are good, and you really can listen to them over and over.